Melatonin: A Cautionary Tale

A little over a year ago, our pediatrician introduced us to what we like to call "Amazing Grace." Its technical name is melatonin. The Beast's body does not produce enough melatonin on its own; thus before the discovery of melatonin, we had a little boy that was awake every night well past one or two in the morning. The first night we gave the Beast a small dose of melatonin was the most wonderful night as a parent I had ever experienced, after I got over the shock of him going to sleep so quickly. Since then, he has taken it every night, and we have had much better nights because of it. Every once in a while, the melatonin seems to have an opposite effect, in which the Beast becomes extremely wired and barely sleeps at all.

Yesterday was as usual a crazy day for us - Sundays always are! It is always a terrible chore to get the boys to nap on a Sunday afternoon, and we are rarely successful. However, on this particular day, the Beast had run off to do his business in the bathroom, and I could hear suspicious noises coming from his place of business. You know, the kind of noises that immediately make you jump up from your chair and bang on the bathroom door, demanding to know what on God's green earth was going on in there. When the Beast finally emerged, I could tell he was trying to hide the fact that he had just put something in his mouth. "What is that? Spit it out right now!" my not-so-calm self shouted. The Nerd managed to pry his mouth open and discovered that somehow the Beast had gotten hold of his bottle of melatonin and had eaten an entire pill. I was relieved - I knew it wouldn't hurt him, and we both thought perhaps this would be the thing to persuade the boys to nap. We gave a tiny bit to the Spud as well, and within minutes, both boys were snoozing away. Gloriousness! This meant a very tired and pregnant momma could get a nap in too!

Then bedtime arrived. After the usual routines of teeth brushing, bathroom going, and pajama clothing, it became very clear that the boys were NOT going to sleep. They became hysterical and giggly and very very LOUD. Every time the Nerd went in for a "visit" to help them remember what the meaning of bedtime was, they just giggled louder and rolled around on the floor. It was very LATE before the boys finally fell into a restless sleep.

Cue Monday. I woke up with the exhaustion that comes from birthday celebrations, over-excited kids, and children's church (now that's another story). The boys were already awake and in the same giddy mood with which they had gone to bed. They dumped all the clothes out of their dresser drawers. They ripped up valuable papers. They made the living room look like a hurricane had hit it in a matter of seconds. They hit their sister and screamed silly things at the top of their lungs. They threw their breakfast on the floor while laughing hysterically. They did all these things ALL DAY. I literally was just seconds away from listing them on Craigslist when the Nerd walked in the door. Dinner was a disaster as we anxiously counted down the minutes until the boys mercifully went to bed and FELL ASLEEP.

The bottle of melatonin is now on a shelf so high I have to use a stepladder to get it. Moral of the story? Never never never melatonize your children for a nap. Unless, of course, you thrive on having DEMONS terrorizing your home the next day. . .

Bathroom Reading - Volume One

How about catching up on a week with the temporarily insane (that's me, the Nerd, and the kiddos) in a concise, easy-to-read list? Perfect for bathroom reading - that is, if you trust your electronic device near the many hazards of the bathroom. I personally consider my Iphone a necessary item to take when headed to the bathroom facilities. It's a convenient place to catch up on Facebook, read a few blog entries, answer an email, etc. Of course, I have to pretend that there aren't little fingers reaching under the bathroom door while loud childish voices clamor for my attention. "Watcha doin' in there, Momma?" "I need you now, Momma!" "Are you poopin' so you can get a lollipop?"

Anyway. . .

1. Our brand-new vacuum cleaner was smoking when the Nerd tried to use it the other day. He took it completely apart, and as it turns out, the boys had managed to shove a baby wipe into the engine while he was cleaning out the filter.

2. It only takes one minute and forty-eight seconds for two little boys to run into the kitchen, open the refrigerator, take out the full carton of eggs and proceed to smash several of them on the living room carpet. I know this because I took that exact amount of time to take a quick load of laundry downstairs, and when I returned, the boys were shouting "Easter eggs! Easter eggs!" rather giddily and the Drama Queen was emphatically declaring that she had nothing to do with it.

3. We had three whole days of no accidents with the Beast in regards to potty training. We were making such amazing progress until the stomach flu hit on Thursday. Since then, it's been Pull-ups all the way, baby.

4. The stomach flu hit the Beast on Thursday and then claimed the Spud on Saturday. As I write this, both boys are doing better on the barf-side of things; but they refuse to eat anything and prefer lying around watching endless Thomas the Tank Engine and Dora episodes on Netflix.

5. Because of the nasty flu, I have been homebound the last few days. Many nights of staying up with the kiddos and boring boring days have led me to complete four books on my Kindle. Here's the scoop:

a. Riven by Jerry B. Jenkins. - good story line but the author takes FOREVER to get to the good stuff. I "speed-read" a lot of pages on that one and had to take a break from it for a little while.

b. It Happens Every Spring by Gary Chapman and Catherine Palmer. - great read! I felt it was a very honest look at Christian marriages today, and the author handled the big cast of characters well.

c. Fools Rush In by Janice Thompson. - what I like to call "chick fluff." There is no real substance at all to this one, which is okay for an "every-once-in-a-while" book. however, the author wrote it in first person, which was very annoying to me.

d. The Pastor's Wife by Jennifer Allee. - I liked this one, especially the story line. I did feel like things happened a little too fast in the book - six years of hurt is healed in less than six months? But overall I enjoyed it.

And that's your bathroom reading for this week! Tune in next week to see what household appliance suffers next! :)

You Ought to Know

(love this man)
Today I'd like to take a moment to just brag a bit on my man. He is, after all, an amazing man and goes above and beyond his duties as husband and daddy all the time.

Take Sunday, for example. It was about an hour before we had to leave for church. I was running around as usual, making sure the three littles had on the appropriate, clean attire, feeding them a somewhat decent breakfast, and keeping them entertained until it was time to leave. I made a quick stop in the kitchen to preheat the oven for baking cinnamon rolls (my turn to bring something for Sunday School) before heading to the bathroom to do the Drama Queen's hair. It wasn't long before I realized that I could smell smoke - and it wasn't from the curling iron! I ran to the kitchen and found everything hidden in black smoke. I quickly turned off the oven, threw open a window, and opened the oven door, slamming it shut when I saw the flames shooting out. Like any good wife, I panicked and ran downstairs to get my husband out of the shower so he could put out the fire. He hurried upstairs with the fire extinguisher and rapidly took care of the offending flames. Apparently, one of our young offspring (I'm placing all my bets on the Beast) had at some point earlier in the morning put a plastic shovel deep inside the oven. At least, that's what we think it was.

Chris surveyed the damage. The oven needed a desperate and deep cleaning. Everything in the kitchen was covered in black soot or extinguisher foam. The air reeked of burning plastic - so bad that I could not handle it for more than a few seconds before gagging and getting out of there. Also, there was no way that the cinnamon rolls were even going to be a remote possibility that morning.

My man volunteered to stay home from church and clean up the mess - it was definitely something that couldn't wait. So while I carted the three littles off to church, stopping at the store on the way to pick up a few coffeecakes, he donned his face mask and protective gloves and began the tedious task of cleaning the kitchen. A few hours later, when the kids and I returned from the morning service, he still was not done. He ushered us back out of the house with instructions to "hit up a MickeyD's with a playland" for a couple more hours until he had the house completely fume-free. I enjoyed french fries and a hot fudge sundae (happiness for this preggo lady!) while watching the kids run around and play.

We came back about 3:00 pm that afternoon, bringing a hot meal for my hard-working man of course. My kitchen was spotless! He had had to wash every pan in the cabinets underneath and around the stove. He had cleaned all the appliances out on the counters and every dish that was stored in the space above the cabinets. Somehow he got the inside and outside of my oven sparkling clean as well as the windows and kitchen floor. Poor tired man! At that point, all he wanted to do was take a bath and go to sleep - but he had promised the Drama Queen that he would teach her to play War that day. So he did! By the time she figured out the game and had eagerly played several rounds with him, it was time to get back to the church for the school's graduation ceremony. It would have been so good for him to skip it and just get to bed, but he was the sound man for the ceremony and had to be there. So he did. I am so amazed and blessed by his fortitude and work ethic!

Not to mention - on Saturday while I was away doing girlie stuff with the Drama Queen, he made himself a "Honey-Do" list and accomplished quite a bit of it - fixing the dresser in the boys' room, vacuuming the entire house, reorganizing all the kids' toys, etc. Sigh. I could get used to this.

Let's just say - Father's Day is going to be a BIG deal around here this year! :)

Monday Mischief

in case anyone was wondering how my Monday went. . .

Wordless Wednesday - Potty Training

It is perfectly acceptable to go without pants on potty training days. Hey, you can even go without a shirt, if you like.

But snow boots are not optional. Just so you know.

Wordless Wednesday - Bitten!

this is the wild child. getting wilder every day.
please note the lovely bite mark on his cheek.
apparently his brother has vampirish tendencies.

more wordless fun at 5 Minutes for Mom...

Meet My Night Owls

The Nerd and I have a little habit of "checking in" on the kids in their rooms one last time before we go to bed each night. Mostly it is so we can stand there and say, "Oh, aren't they so cute when they are sleeping?" or something to that effect. Often it is so we can transfer a heavy, snoring child from floor to bed, and occasionally it is to catch that last about-to-explode diaper.

A few nights ago, we called it a night at 11:30 pm and started to turn off lights, clean up, etc. The kids' rooms had been quiet for hours. The Nerd went down the hall to check on the boys. He opened the door and found both boys standing there, wide awake, and asking "can we have a drink pleeease?" It completely startled him, as he thought the boys were sound asleep in their beds. From my spot in the kitchen, I could hear the Spud chanting, "drink, drink, drink!"

I just cracked up even though I knew the next morning would be tough with such late-nighters! I wish i had taken a picture - two little guys, standing patiently at their bedroom door, grinning at Daddy and begging for a drink.

Of course we complied - who wouldn't?

Superman

I had one of those days yesterday.

The boys broke my favorite lamp. The Drama Queen took 2 hours to clean up a ten-minute mess. Ungrateful children sat at my lunch table. The Beast ruined a painting I had done for a customer. I lost my favorite drawing pencil. The boys howled like Indians through their entire nap time, despite repeated visits from Momma. The rain poured down all day long.

When the Nerd finally came home that evening, three kids were chanting "We want Little Einsteins! We want Little Einsteins!" while my brain searched desperately for coherent thoughts on what to make for dinner.

And then he asked THE question: "How was your day?"

I burst into tears, unexpectedly but with some relief.

The Nerd, aka Superman, did not say another word. He quickly surveyed the remains of the broken lamp and the ruined painting and took action. He marched the kiddies into the living room, put on their favorite TV show, and admonished them to be quiet. Then he went out to the kitchen and began making dinner! After a satisfying dinner of sausage, pancakes, and fried potatoes, he cleaned up the dining room and kitchen while I herded the kiddies through their bathtime routines. I mentioned that I really needed a new drawing pencil to get some projects done that evening, and he encouraged me to go out and get one - and stay out for a little while and enjoy the solitude.

Yeah, he is definitely Superman in my book! I feel blessed, fortunate, thankful. . . and ready to have a much better day than yesterday!

Gummy Bears

We have been haphazardly trying to potty train the Beast. A 6 pound bag of gummy bears is aiding and abetting us in this endeavor. Apparently the stubborn young fellow will do a lot to earn these coveted gummy treasures, and his sister cheers him on valiantly in hopes of also getting a treat (preferably green).

One night, I went upstairs to check on the kids only to find that the Beast had a most unpleasant smell. He insisted that he still had to go potty; so I sent him downstairs to get cleaned up and to try using the potty. The hubby helped him get situated, and soon his efforts earned him a handful of gummy bears. We sent him, clutching his gummy bears like a trophy, back to bed.

I had just sat back down to do some more work on a custom name train when I heard a very offended voice over the room monitor.
"Hey! Where did you get gummy bears? That's not fair!"
(silence)
"Daaaaddddddy! Daddy! I need some gummy bears too!"
(silence)
"Daddy? Please may I have some gummy bears? "
(another silence)
"Momma? Momma! I want some gummy bears too!"
(longer silence)
and finally. . .
"God? I really need gummy bears!"

At that point, Daddy could no longer resist, and the Drama Queen ended up with a handful of gummy bears (mostly green) as well.