A Letter to My Seven-Year-Old

 Dear Gabi,
     God has blessed me with four amazing, undeservedly-wonderful children.  You, my sweet girl, are one of those blessings that I thank God for daily.  You are the one that changed me from wife to momma, and although I love you and your siblings equally, there is just something special about the firstborn.
     With you, darling, I have experienced all kinds of momma firsts.  Together, we have navigated our way through growing and losing teeth, tantrums and sweet first words, reading and playing together.  I cherish the relationship that you and I have, and I hope it only grows stronger throughout the years ahead.
     I am humbled and inspired by the person you are at age seven.  I want to tell you about these things that I admire about you because I want you to hold on to these things and make them a part of yourself always.
    1.  First, you have such a tender heart.  When things aren't right between you and someone else, you can't do anything else until that has been resolved.  I hear it in your earnest prayers to God and in your conversations throughout the day.
    2.  Secondly, you exhibit such a spirit of kindness, especially towards your brothers and sister.  I rarely have to remind you to share - you are always a step ahead of me, volunteering your things to others.  Even at seven, you recognize that your autistic brother needs more kindness and understanding than most, and you freely offer it to him without expecting anything in return.
    3.  God has blessed you with an overflowing well of love.  Our days are full of hugs, kisses, and "I love you's" from you.  I hope you know that every time you give Daddy one of those hugs and kisses, you melt his heart and strengthen his resolve to be the best daddy he can to you.  Never stop sharing your love.  Unfortunately, there will be people in the future that make you want to hide and hold love back.  Resolve now to love openly, despite others.
    4.  We named you well, Gabi!  You and I have dozens of conversations all day, and though I may not always look like I am paying complete attention, I am savoring the fact that you trust and love me enough to share what you're thinking.  I pray that you will always feel free to share your heart with me.  I love to listen to your thoughts - it makes me marvel at the lovely young lady you're becoming.
     This weekend of celebrating your seventh birthday will be forever engraved in my memory.  Spending time with you shopping, getting your ears pierced, and having the privilege to get your your first American Girl doll were all priceless experiences.  I am so proud of you for getting your ears pierced!  I know that your fears often get in the way of you having some great experiences.  I totally get how paralyzing those fears can be, no matter how silly they may seem later.  I know every fiber of your being didn't want to go back to the earring store to get your ears pierced, even though you wanted it so badly.  But you managed to find the tools to overcome that fear, and I can see how happy you are that you went through with it.  I will be reminding you of this victory time and again as you face more fears in the future.
    For this year of your life, I have two wishes.  First, I pray that you will grow in leaps and bounds in your relationship with Jesus Christ this year.  Also, I hope that you will be able to make some new and wonderful friendships this year.  I know this is not your strong point.  You hide behind your shyness and wait for others to make the first move.  Ask God for courage, my sweet love, this year to speak up and to be the one to introduce yourself.  You can do it, and you will reap the benefits of good friendships for a lifetime!
    I love you, Gabi!  Happy happy birthday to you!  I can't wait to see what wonderful things this year will bring for you.
          all my love, always and forever,
                            Momma

 {happy surprise!}

 {Daddy's girl always}

{happy chocolate cake}

(Mostly) Clean Eating Chocolate Cake

We have been faithfully following the Feingold Program in our family since April.  If you're new around here or unfamiliar with Feingold, it's a diet that eliminates all foods with artificial food colors and flavors, most preservatives, artificial sweeteners, and initially some foods with salicylic acid (like apples, tomatoes, peppers, etc.)  Originally, I started the family on this program to see if it would help our autistic son.  The results with the Beast were immediate and exciting.  As I have related on this blog before, I started noticing positive results in the other kids as well as myself and the Nerd.  Since then, we have slowly been moving towards an even more drastic change in our diet.  Clean eating is eating lots of fresh, organic fruits and vegetables, some locally raised meat, dairy products, seeds, nuts, and things made with whole grains.  It excludes refined grains (like white flour and white rice and refined sweeteners as well as most "processed" foods.  We have made gradual changes along these lines and love the way we feel when we "eat clean." 

The Spud's birthday was the first time I attempted making a birthday cake clean eating style.  I played around with some ingredients to make the cake, and then used the Gracious Pantry's recipe for chocolate pumpkin frosting.  Somehow no photos were taken of the cake; so I can't tantalize you with a delicious-looking picture.  You'll just have to take my word that this cake is good!  The frosting is definitely different.  The Nerd said it tasted a little weird at first, but then he started to really like it. 
I call it (mostly) clean eating cake because there is turbinado sugar in it, and we also decorated the top of the cake with Joe-Joe's (Trader Joes' version of chocolate sandwich cookies). 

(Mostly) Clean Eating Chocolate Cake
You'll need:
* 2 cups whole wheat flour (I think whole wheat pastry flour would work even better)
* 3/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
* 1 1/2 TBS baking powder
* 1 1/2 cups raw sugar (turbinado)
* 1/4 tsp salt
* 2 eggs, slightly beaten
* 1 1/2 TBS vanilla extract
* 1 1/2 cups whole milk
* 2/3 cup coconut oil or softened butter (unsalted)

To Make:
1.  Preheat the oven to 325 degrees.  Butter and flour a 9x13 pan and set aside.  (This recipe would work also in two 8 inch round pans; but baking time will be shorter.)
2.  Combine all dry ingredients (flour, cocoa powder, baking powder, sugar, and salt) and whisk together.
3.  Combine all wet ingredients (eggs, vanilla, whole milk, and coconut oil) and mix well.
4.  Add wet mixture to dry mixture and beat until smooth. 
5.  Spread batter evenly into the pan and put it in the oven.
6.  Bake for 35 to 40 minutes, until the top springs back gently when you touch it or a toothpick comes out clean. 

When the cake is completely cool (and still in the pan), make the Gracious Pantry's frosting recipe (find it here) and smooth it over the top of your cake.  I did use agave nectar instead of honey in that recipe.  For my car lover, I smashed some Joe-Joe's and sprinkled them on the frosting and then outlined a monster truck arena with more Joe-Joe's.  The Spud picked out some of his favorite Monster Truck toys to put on the cake, and I spelled his name out with foam letters. 

The Nerd recently celebrated his birthday and has requested a late birthday cake - a cheesecake, no less.  So I'm on the lookout for a clean eating cheesecake recipe now. :)

Enjoy your chocolate cake!

Little Man and the Birthday





We have a birthday tradition in our family of tying a big bunch of bright balloons on the birthday child's chair and leaving a special small gift at their breakfast plate.  When they wake up and come upstairs to the dining room, they get so excited to see the balloons and gift, and it just sets the tone for the whole fun day.

 The Spud's fourth birthday was a couple of weeks ago.  On the morning of his special day, I set about making pancakes for the crew.  The Drama Queen came into the kitchen and casually commented, "Hey, I guess it isn't his birthday today after all.  There aren't any balloons on his chair."  My heart dropped.  How had I completely forgotten our birthday tradition?  The Nerd hadn't yet left for work, and he overheard her comment.  He disappeared into the bedroom and came out a short while later with a wrapped gift.  "Hey, buddy, we forgot to put this by your plate this morning," he said as he handed it over to an excited Spud.  I mouthed a quick "thank-you" and quickly turned my attention back to the pancakes.  It really wasn't a big deal in itself.
It's just that - poor Spud always seems to get the short end of the stick, especially when it comes to birthdays.  One birthday we only got him one gift - a Cozy Coupe (used, no less).  Apparently we have a tendency to get back on the "get-out-of-debt" wagon during the summer, and it affects poor Spud's birthdays.  Of course, he is the kind of kid that gets a lot of joy (and a lot of mileage!) out of toys, and he never seemed bothered by it.

 This year, we were determined to make it better.  I failed on the balloons front, but we managed to have a fun dinner out that night and spoiled him with lots of gifts, mostly Thomas the Tank Engine in nature.  It wasn't his year for a birthday party, but we surprised him with a trip to Shady Dell Miniature Trains later that week. 

 It was a gorgeous Sunday afternoon, and all the kids were excited to ride the trains at Shady Dell.  Every time I looked at Spud that afternoon, he was grinning from ear to ear.  It was definitely the best way to celebrate his special day.

 I can't believe my little man is four years old.  He is the most stubborn and yet the sweetest little guy.  I count myself so privileged to spend time with him every day and to be his momma.  Often, he will surprise me with a fierce hug and kiss;  the next moment he is running away and shouting no. 
He is passionate about his cars and trains.  I will help him get his tracks all set up early in the morning, and he will drive his trains and cars around for hours on end.  He adores his big brother and sister and usually gives in to what they want. 

He fits perfectly into our family.  I  know that tomorrow morning, he will be the first to greet me with a sleepy hello and a request for cereal.  I absolutely adore him.  Happy birthday, sweet Spud!

A Few More Piratey Things

I neglected to mention a couple of things in yesterday's pirate party post. First, how could I have forgotten to include a picture of the cutest pirate at the party?

 She of course loved the attention.  Saucy little swashbuckler!

 And the invitations!  I drew treasure maps per the Beast's request and made copies.  We stained them with tea bags, and unhappy with the not-very-antiqued results, we crumpled them up and dabbed them with brown paint.  Finally, I burned the edges with a lighter, which was my little pyro's favorite part.

We rolled them up, tied them with string, and delivered them to some very excited classmates.  And now you know the rest of the story...

How to Have a Pirate Party - ASD style

It is our family tradition to have a big birthday party every other year.  It works out nicely for us - this year the Beast and Little Sprout will have birthday parties, and next year the Drama Queen and the Spud will have their birthday parties, and so on.  The Beast chose pirates as the theme for his party and was extremely excited to have his friends come over to his house.  Because of his autism and sensory issues, in the past he has not handled birthday parties so well, especially those at loud and overcrowded places (think Chuck E. Cheese, for example).  So I decided to host a party for him and his friends at our house - a place where we could control the environment, the noise level, etc.  

 The first thing I did was hire a "real pirate" to come to the party. :)  Cap'n Blownapart is a college student at our church who had been to clown school and had a passion for all things piratey; so I knew the Beast would be comfortable with him there.

 I kept the decorations pretty simple.  I drew a welcome sign on our whiteboard, mostly because I knew he would get a kick out of seeing his own name.  The Happy Birthday banner was from Dollar Tree, as were a few other decorations and party supplies.

 I also found these super cute pirate decorations to hang from the ceiling at Party City.  Decorations hanging from the ceiling are great - they add a lot of color and punch but are not too distracting or overstimulating for him and his friends.  I talked to the Beast before his party so we could plan what to do in case he got too overwhelmed.  He decided that he would go downstairs to his room if things got to be too much.  During the party, he only disappeared to his room once, and he quickly came back out to join his friends.

 Planning the party food took some thought.  As a family, we started the Feingold Diet last week, meaning no artificial food colors, no artificial flavors, no preservatives, and the elimination of some salicylic foods, such as apples, oranges, tomatoes, grapes, etc.  I ended up making chocolate cupcakes from scratch and decorated them to look like little treasure islands.  The palm trees were plastic drink stirrers from the dollar store.  The main dishes were ham'n'cheese pirate boats, and the side dishes were a fruit tray of mango, cantaloupe, pineapple, and kiwi, and a bowl of organic cheese fish snacks.  The fruit, especially the mango, was the biggest hit!

 When party guests arrived, they got fitted for a paper pirate hat and matching eyepatch.  I used the free printable here.  Cap'n Blownapart made balloon swords and other balloon creatures for every pirate in attendance.

 I covered our cooler with brown paper and foil to make it look like a treasure chest and filled it with "pirate water."  (The Nerd designed and printed out treasure map water bottle labels that we put on each water bottle.  The kids used a Sharpie to write their name on their bottle, and presto! everyone had their own drink that was portable and somewhat spill-proof.)

 I hid "booty" for the kids to find in five different locations in the house.  Cap'n Blownapart helped the kids read the scavenger hunt clues, and then off they scattered to search for their treasure.  Prizes found were fish whistles, little plastic spyglasses, and lots of plastic gold coins.  The attending pirates filled their treasure bags and then got to take them home for a goody bag.

In true form, the Beast insisted everyone sing Happy Birthday to him and then plugged his ears as we did so.  By that time, he had had just about enough.  The kids sat on the floor and munched on cupcakes while he opened his gifts.  With each gift, he said, "Shiver me timbers! Thank ye very much!"  I have no idea where he got that line, but it was super cute.
The kids left with their armloads of balloon swords and booty bags, and the Beast stimmed for an hour.  It was worth it though to see him so excited and so proud to have his friends at his house.  I think we found the right balance of excitement and calm for him so that he could really enjoy his day.

Dear Brain, Please Stop

Ah, I haven't posted in a whole week! That's not to say that there aren't a host of them swimming around in my mind, though. The month of April is Autism Awareness Month, and as most of you know, our Beast was diagnosed with high-functioning autism almost two years ago. We are currently in the midst of a series of evaluations, teacher meetings, specialist meetings, and an ever-growing mound of paperwork. The Beast just celebrated his fifth birthday (fifth?!!!!) yesterday while he and I try to navigate through ever-increasing meltdowns, struggles to communicate, and most recently, bedwetting.

My brain is so literally filled to the brim with autism-related problems and hopeful helps that I am having trouble sleeping at night. I spend copious amounts of time researching and trying new ways to communicate and help my son. Then I worry and feel guilty that I may not be paying enough attention to my other children. It's a balancing act that makes me uncomfortable, but discomfort is all a part of parenting, anyway, as I am finding out more and more each day.

So while my head has been spinning and my heart has been hurting, life has still been a joy. God has given us more than we ever imagined, and my heart still smiles at the memory of my three oldest excitedly whispering to one another in their bedroom last night after a birthday celebration at John's Incredible Pizza. This weekend will be filled with Easter happiness and yes, probably a LOT of overstimulation for our little man.

Decisions are in the making for the Beast's education and other well-being. Next week, our whole family will be starting a new adventure as we tackle the Feingold diet(http://feingold.org/) and the drastic changes that will bring to our lives.

But, today, I am going to try to enjoy this day I have been given. The kids are playing with the Beast's new giant bowling set in the hallway, and Momma's got to show them her awesome bowling moves.

On Crazy Kids and Angry Birds

The Drama Queen turned six on Friday. Six going on sixteen, if you ask her. Suddenly my little girl wants to be treated like a grown-up. Still, she did not hesitate to put her new rainbow hair clips in and jump around in a circle to show me how high the curls could bounce...

She requested an Angry Birds cake. I had received a Cake Pops book from my mom for my birthday and had wanted to try my hand at them for a while now, so we decided on Angry Birds cake pops.

As usual, I ended up staying up way too late to try to make them perfect and agonizing over every crooked eyebrow and beak askew. The Drama Queen liked them just the way they were and gave me her Angry Birds face in approval.

We took the cake pops to John's Incredible Pizza and happily ate a variety of pizza and pasta while watching Curious George and Inspector Gadget in the cartoon room. And of course, our Drama Queen was showered with gifts from us and her grandparents.


Then we braved the noise and crowd chaos of the game room, playing game after game and trading in our tickets for silly little prizes. Totally worth it when a beaming, not-so-grown-up-after-all face looked up at me and said, "That was the greatest birthday ever, Mom!'

Six

Yesterday I posted the birth story of our newest addition to the family. Today I am thinking about the time six years ago that we headed into the hospital to have our first baby girl.

It was the day I first became a mother and the day I truly realized what deep unconditional love was.

Today we are celebrating our firstborn's sixth birthday. She is incredibly excited!

She woke up to find a bunch of Hello Kitty balloons from her daddy tied to her breakfast chair and a whole set of Disney Princess school supplies from mommy.

She chose rainbow sprinkle pancakes for breakfast and played happily with her brothers all morning. ( no school on your birthday in this house!)

Tomato soup is her all-time favorite food so it starred for lunch.

The afternoon promises some fun at Grandma's, and the evening will be spent at John's Incredible Pizza with several varieties of gourmet pizza, Angry Bird cake pops, and lots of arcade games.

This girl is so grown-up lately. Sometimes she amazes me with her maturity and profound thoughts. She surprises me often with her offers to help and her "second mommy" role in our household. She has become Daddy's favorite video game buddy and my favorite artist and crafter. She still retains a lot of child-like enthusiasm and giddiness over the smallest of things, and for that I am grateful.

May God bless this next year with our beautiful daughter!

Happy Birthday to my Man

Today my man turns thirty-one. We celebrated with family on Friday night at John's Incredible Pizza - I don't know who had more fun at the arcade, the kids or the Nerd. :) The kids gifted him with handpicked cards and presents from the dollar store. That man is now the proud owner of several plastic sports cups, a ball gun, slime, and more. I am sure the cards - a Transformers one from the Drama Queen, a dinosaur one from the Beast, and a Dora the Explorer one from the Spud - are now prominently displayed in his cubicle.

As for me, I will buy the man whatever he wants for his birthday - he tells me and I go get it. It's verysimple and terribly noncreative or romantic - but it makes my man happy. And I am all about that. He also gets to pick any cake he wants out of my multitude of baking books. I am in the process of making a peanut butter chocolate torte for the man of the day. We are also looking forward to grilled steaks, rice, and corn tonight when he gets home from work.

Speaking of food, I founda super easy sliced baked potato recipe the other night whilst pinteresting (is that a word??) We tried it last night - amazing! Try it - it will change the way you make baked potatoes forever.

How to Have a Monkey Party

I debated a long time over the theme for the Spud's birthday party this year. He is an avid lover of cars, trains, and really anything with wheels; so any of these seemed natural choices for party themes. However, the Spud just happened to born at the same time as a bunch of girls in our group, and I wondered how many of his little girly friends would enjoy a car-themed party. I finally settled on a monkey party, since he wanted to have his party at the local park. (Plus, we call him "little monkey" all the time!)

The invitations were handed out a few weeks in advance, all tied up with monkey ribbon.

We asked guests to come join us at our favorite local park for some "monkeyin' around" at the playground and the splash park. All they needed to bring was some stuff to get wet in and a wrapped squirt gun or water toy for the gift exchange.

Food and treats were super easy to make for this theme. The monkey cupcakes were the stars of the show - made with chocolate-frosted cupcakes, nilla wafers, and marshmallows.

I used a simple styrofoam cone from the Dollar Tree to create a monkey lollipop tree. The little monkeys were hot-glued onto the suckers and then stuck into the tree for party favors.

The funky monkey leis made of froot loops and string were a big hit with the party guests. They could run around and play while carrying their snack with them wherever they went. These actually did not take too long to make, and as a bonus, the Beast helped me and got a fine motor skills activity in for the day.

The day turned out slightly cool and overcast - not ideal for getting wet. Still, friends buddied up quickly to tackle the slides and monkey bars and swings.

The Spud was overjoyed that his friend Pursy could come to his party. (Apparently summer birthday parties are harder than I thought - everyone is already on vacation or committed to something else when you invite them!) Pursy and Spud chased each other all over the playground, and that girl never let that balloon out of her sight.

Little friends hung out near the picnic tables with the grownups and waited patiently for snacks and cupcakes.

I tried to make the snacks not only coordinate with the theme but also with the Spud's favorite treats. Besides the cupcakes, lollipops, and froot loop leis, we had "monkey munch" (chocolate animal crackers and marshmallows), peanut butter and banana sandwiches, and fruit snacks. The tables were decorated with red streamers, colorful balloons, and an inflatable monkey. (all from the dollar store - cha-ching!)

At one point, all of our monkeys were in a huge tree on the playground property.

The gift exchange went over well. Everyone got to open one wrapped water toy - we went from youngest to oldest. After all the gifts were opened, the trading commenced until everyone was happy with the toy they received.

Later, after everyone left and we had finished cleaning up our party area, the weather warmed up enough for our three kiddos to quickly change into their swimsuits and go play in the splash park for ten minutes or so. We ended our special day by driving over to the local Burgerville, where they were featuring "throw-back prices" for one day only. Three very tired and happy littles munched cheeseburgers and fries and slurped their chocolate milkshakes before heading off to bed.

Success! I still can't believe my little monkey is three! I must admit though that this preggo momma is exhausted from all the party planning. No more parties for a while!

Three Already

Oh my sweet little man, tomorrow you turn all of three years old. It seems that just in the past few weeks you have grown up so much. You are becoming quite the potty pro and such a helper to your momma. :) It has been so much joy to be your momma and to celebrate this special birthday with you this weekend.

You requested mac'n'cheese and hamburgers for your birthday dinner, but you were way too excited about your presents to eat a single bite. Apparently your brother and sister were pretty excited too!

I knew you would be getting plenty of cake the next day at your monkey party; so we decided on a cookie pizza for our family celebration. You probably poked at the frosting at least a dozen times before dinner, with the excuse that you "were just looking at your cool cake." Your brother beat you to blowing out the candles, but I wasn't about to let you miss your moment. I made your daddy relight them so you could do it yourself, and you did it in one glorious breath.

The wrapping paper excited you just as much as what was inside. It probably helped that your brother and sister kept chanting, "Open it! Open it!"

The pirate ship was a big hit - not only with you but with your brother and sister as well. I guess you'll have to learn how to share it. :)

And Grandma and Grandpa knew just what to get our growing little man - a big boy bike (in a Cars theme of course!)

And apparently we can never go wrong with Thomas. You immediately begged to have your new track sets put together so you could spend some time pushing your favorite trains around the tracks. You didn't even want to stop so you could go over to grandma and grandpa's house for a sleepover.

I guess I can't stop you from getting older. But amid all the grown-up things you are trying to do, I still see bits and pieces of my little boy, patiently playing with his trains or snuggling up with Momma to watch a favorite Veggie Tales.

I love you, Spud! Happy Happy birthday to you!

Celebrating the Little Things

We like to make a big deal about little things around here. Everyone gets to have two birthday celebrations each year - once on their birthday and once on their half-birthday. Yesterday was our chance to make the Drama Queen feel special on her 5 1/2 years of life.

First, we went to a local penny carnival . Armed with twenty pennies each, the kids were excited to try their hand at a variety of games.

We exchanged our pennies for tickets and had a blast exploring the carnival. Tossing beanbags, "fishing" for candy, doing a candy walk, tossing rings onto bottles, and more awaited our somewhat rowdy crew. The Beast shut down after just a few games, but he was content to watch the others play. The Spud had a very hard time staying with Momma and waiting his turn in line. The Drama Queen had a great time - especially since a sweet friend was able to join us for our day of fun. With the girls' hard work, they were able to earn enough tickets to score a big candy treat for each kid at the end. The Drama Queen was convinced that the penny carnival was being held just for her. :)

and of course, all birthday celebrations MUST have cake. It's practically the law. The Drama Queen has changed her favorite color to pink and specifically asked me to make a Hello Kitty cake for this occasion. Even the cake inside was bright pink with a rich chocolaty filling.


It may take a little extra effort to celebrate half-birthdays as well as regular birthdays, but I hope that these will be special memories for the kids in years to come. And while they are so little, it is nice for them not to have to wait a WHOLE year before they can have a birthday again. :) What can I say - I'm just a kid at heart! (and I love any and all excuses for more cake!)