Boys Are Stupid

(disclaimer:  some potty words are used in the following post as well as the word stupid, which is just a bad as a potty word in our house.  you have been warned.)

Boys.  Before I ever had the privilege of being a momma to my children and in particular my two boys, I was a junior-high teacher.  I remember insects being put in the microwave, daring stunts performed without a thought or care to the danger of it all, and senseless destruction of books, papers, and pretty much anything those junior high boys could get their hands on.  I remember asking "Why?", "Why on earth?" and any other version of "Why?" you can think of.  Staring at their blank faces, I realized that they themselves had no idea why they were doing what they were doing, other than to drive their parents and myself to an early grave.  I formulated a theory that when puberty hit, so did stupidity.  It couldn't be helped.  Junior high girls were emotional and irrational;  junior high boys were stupid.

I thought that period of my life was over.  At least, until my boys hit that age, anyway.  But certain little "why?"s have been creeping their way into my daily dialogue lately:

"But why did you poop all over the laundry room floor?  The bathroom is right down the hall!!!  You had to have deliberately gone into the laundry room instead!  Why???????????????"

"Please tell me why you thought it was a good idea to rip every page out of your favorite book.  Are you seriously going to stand there and cry when I tell you that I can't read it to you tonight?  Why??????"

"What is that in your hand?  How did you get that water bottle when you are supposed to buckled in your booster seat?  And what is that pale yellow liquid in the bottle?  Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh never mind......why??????????"

"I thought I just tightened up the waistband on those shorts.  Why do you keep tugging them up like that?  OH! I see you forgot to put on underwear today....oh, you didn't want to wear underwear today?  Why??????????"

"And what is that at the bottom of your shorts?  Who did that?  Where did you get a hold of a pair of scissors?  And why on earth would you cut up the hem of a perfectly good pair of shorts?  Why?????"

(said outside the men's bathroom at church)  "Hey buddy, are you done yet?  Hurry up, Momma's waiting and we need to get back to the service."  (I grab a passing man and ask him to go in and check on my son.  Yes, he is still alive.  No, he has no clothes on.)  "Come on, hurry and put your pants back on and come out, please."  (child comes out.  naked.  )  "Ooooookay then, let's hurry and get dressed.  Why did you take off all your clothes?"  (and why are so many people already out of the service and walking by while I dress my kid?????)  "Why??????"

I am quite sure that they don't know why.  It could be a part of some big conspiracy theory, which I would not put past the Spud.  But obviously focusing on the "why?"s of it all doesn't help the situation.

So I have come up with a long-term solution.  I am going to keep track of every single "why?" moment I have with these precious young men.  Someday, they are going to come to me with reasons why I should trust them to have a cell phone, go somewhere with their friends, or (gasp!!) drive.  It is then I will pull out my long list of "why?"s to demonstrate why not. 

After all, those junior high boys that fried a grasshopper in the microwave are now grown men, some married and even with children.  I'll consider this post a sort of public service announcement to girls everywhere.  Boys are stupid.  It's us that helps even it out, balance out the stupidity if you will. 

P.S.  I adore my silly boys.  I don't understand their shenanigans half the time, but boy do those guys have a firm grasp on my heart!

Iphone Photo Phun - In Which I Show Favoritism

So I missed out on participating in Iphone Photo Phun last week. You would think that was due to the insanely busy schedule we are now keeping, with homeschooling and an ever-exhausting pregnancy. Nope. I couldn't find the cord that hooks my Iphone up to my laptop to get the photos off. I didn't find said cord until this morning. I take it as a good thing though. I mean, I could have lost one of the kids. Although I probably would have tried harder to find them if I did. Lose them, I mean.

Anyway, here's the past two weeks in all Iphoto glory (and no I don't love the youngest more than the others - he's just a lot more willing to pose for photos without shutting his eyes or making ridiculously cheesy grins. Also, he is pretty cute, I must say.)

We showed our patriotism on the tenth anniversary of the tragic events of September 11th.

Screams of delight always greet my announcement of "breakfast for dinner." Apparently pancakes, french toast, sausage, and eggs are in high demand around here. This particular evening, even the eggs seemed excited about it.

I took a quick photo here of the little scholar busy doing her Letters and Sounds page.

The Spud had his three-year-old well-child visit to the doctor. He was pleased to find out he was old enough to wear the little hospital gown and up-to-date on his shots.

The little man is getting more independent every day. Putting his own shoes on is his newest accomplishment, a feat that couldn't have come soon enough for his poor preggo mommy.

I bravely took the kids to a library story time last week. The theme of the day was "Getting Dressed." The Beast paid no attention to any of it until underwear was mentioned. Then he felt the need to announce to the whole class that he had special underwear, underwear with a "door" in it. The Spud chose a book about underwear to take home and has been giggling hysterically at it every night at bedtime.

We managed to get a bike ride in while the weather was cooler. By bike ride, I mean only the Beast rode his bike the whole time. I spent most of my time steadying the Drama Queen's bike and assuring her that she would not fall. the Spud mostly pushed his bike around and pedaled it only occasionally.

And with that, this preggo lady is going to bed. :)