Friday, May 29, 2009

Help - teetering on the rope here

I am sitting here watching paint dry. Seriously. That's the excitement of my life, folks!

It's after midnight, and as usual, I am working feverishly on my art while the kiddies (and hubby!) sleeps. I would rather be in bed right now curled up next to my man instead of painting.

And, now, in between coats of magenta and teal and sunny yellow, I have time to sit. And think. It is so rare to have this time to myself anymore.

After a morning of erranding with the kids (yep, i just invented a new word - go me!) and spending "quality time" with them at the McDonalds' playplace, I finally got a chance to get in the shower. As all moms (especially moms of small children) know, getting in an uninterrupted shower is a rare blessing indeed. And today was no rare blessing - while trying to lather up and relax, I was fielding a thousand questions from the aptly-named Gabi.

So here I am, taking a breath, "relaxing" while trying to keep my mind from racing ahead to all the things that have to be done tomorrow and my heart from worrying that I am not spending enough time with my children now that The Framed Frog is growing. Why do we mothers do that? It's as if I just can't turn it off - it just keeps going and going and going.

I am struggling with balance in my life right now. My little business is growing and at this stage it demands so much time from me. Of course, three little ones also demand a huge chunk of time. Throw in a husband and a sadly neglected house and iI start to wobble on this tightrope of life. More importantly, I've got my relationship with God to keep current and growing. Oh, and don't forget friendships and family too...

I need some help! Any advice for a momma who's trying to fit it all in and worrying that some of it may be falling through the cracks? When I first started The Framed Frog, I prayed a lot and asked God to show me that He was in it by blessing me with orders. And the orders keep on coming...

Okay, the paint is dry. Time to put another coat on these canvasses...

6 comments:

  1. AMEN sister! You know that I struggle with this all the time AND I too stay up at all hours of the night trying to fit it in!

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  2. I have no words of wisdom, but I do stand beside you in the "how do I fit it all in?!" frame of mind. *hugs* I will pray that you find guidance. :)

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  3. Oh goodness, I feel the same way. If you find the answer, please tell me!
    The past several days I've been feeling like I'm nuturing and raising my computer instead of my kids. Sometimes I just want to turn everything off and forget it all...but for some reason I just want to keep going. I feel like I'll be a failure if I just quit it all. So, don't worry, you're not alone. And it makes me feel SO much better to see that I'm not alone either! I sure do love reading your blog. :)

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  4. I'm happy that your business is growing. You've got great products. I would recommend you consider re-evaluating your prices. If you're overwhelmed you could charge more for pieces. You might get less orders but you'll make more on the orders you are making. You could also consider some outside help. Maybe a student to watch the kids a few hours a week. Work-at-home moms have the toughest job because you can't completely focus on one thing at a time.

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  5. Jeanette,
    I want you to just take heart. You will find yourself in a juggling quandry no matter what you do. As the kids get older it will be school and their activities added in. This is motherhood!

    Think of your great grandmother. While she spent hours laboring over the washboard and boiling her lye soap she never once worried that she wasnt spending enough time with her kids.

    On butchering day she spent all day butchering those chickens and plucking their feathers, getting them ready for the ice house.

    She spent hours cooking huge meals for the threshing crew. Shoot, I can remember making pies one day for a farm crew of only three hands plus a family of seven. I made 6 pumpkin pies and they were all gone in one meal! Several hours of work GONE in ten minutes. But your grandmother would have picked the pumpkin, boiled it out, and made the pies all the while keeping the wood fire burning so the ovens stayed at an even heat.

    Now what has this got to do with you? Just this: Not once did we on the farm, or your grandmother ever EVER stop to wonder if we were neglecting our kids.

    Guilt trips were non existent. We have all this guilt now because the psychologists have told us how it should be. We've bought into the thinking that we need to be taking the kids to the park, cutting pb&j sandwiches into heart shapes, playing Hi ho cheerio, and all this stuff we should be dong with our kids...it weighs on us and makes us feel like we are not the parent we should be.

    Lookk at the proverbs 31 woman!She was a business lady. It says her family was clothed with scarlet but nowhere does it tell us that she sits in the evening reading stories to her children, or she sits in the evening putting puzzles together with her kids. Nope, she is busy, busy, busy.

    And so are you. Instead of buying scarlet from from the merchants and purchasing fields you are bringing in money by crafting.

    I can gaurantee you that when you get past the guilt of mommyhood that you will worry less about balance. You need to be confident that what you are doing now will benefit your family in the future by bringing in money to help keep things afloat.

    Your kids are fine. The love messes. They love just having you there.

    Mommy guilt is something we will always fight but dont give in to it! Now if you need something for your own sanity I would hire someone to watch the kids for a couple of hours, but in the meantime dont feel guilty.

    There now see how large an epistle I have written to thee with my own hand? (I love writing sentences like that to someone I know will catch on to the nuance there) lOL

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  6. I had 4 children in 5 years. At one time I had three children in diapers. I worked full time with 4 children in daycare for a time.

    I will tell you this - it gets easier as they get older.

    You are less exhausted and your time is less constantly in demand. People who disagree with this have frequently forgotten the reality of raising babies.

    I found cutting back necessary at times, and you can't cut back on the care of the children (too much) The advice of Mrs. Darling seems very sound - raise your prices a bit, you fine, in demand artist!

    Good Luck with the struggles many mothers face - balancing time, energy and money.

    And P.S.
    Praying to God helps.

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