Mexalian

I have yet to do a restaurant review here on my blog. So I'm pulling out all the stops here to give you an intimate look inside the eatery Bruno's, off Pike Place in Seattle, Washington.

When you plan to go out to eat, you usually choose a restaurant based on its main style of food. If you're craving Mexican, you go to Chili's or Chevy's or Mazatlan. If you're jonesin' for some Asian food, you probably know what local cafe does it best. Italian lovers might go to Carrabas or Olive Garden or The Old Spaghetti Factory.

But at Bruno's, my friends, we were amazed to find that this was an Italian/Mexican restaurant. Ah ha! Here a couple who may not agree on what kind of food can compromise. When you first enter Bruno's, you will be pleased at the general decor. The management has obviously made a big effort to include both Italian and Mexican influences in the atmosphere of the restaurant. A few vine wreaths with clusters of grapes and chili peppers adorn the walls. A painting of a scene in Venice is propped up against another wall, with a sleeping amigo in a sombrero oddly juxtaposed into the painting. Massive advertisements for Mexican beer and Italian wines are plastered randomly throughout the eatery.

Next, as you look around, you will note that this is one hoppin' place. An ancient man is asleep at a back table. Two other elderly men are seated with a metal tub full of beers at their table while they stare intently at the flat-screen tv. Yes, folks, this high-end restaurant has its very own large flat-screen tv, which alternately plays Mexican game shows and Spanish soap operas. Very classy indeed.

With all of these features, it is no wonder that we are excited to see the menu. Both of us have been craving some good Mexican food, and it looks like this is the place! We open our menus to review our options. It seems a little strange to see a plate of chicken parmesan next to the 2-burrito special, but we are quite thrilled to have so many choices. Presently a waitress with a droopy ponytail and even droopier uniform comes to take our order. Chris decides on the 2-enchilada platter while I prove to be a bit more adventurous in ordering the shrimp burrito. She apathetically writes it down and plops a plate of chips and salsa on the table.

We are starving at this point - we have been sight-seeing all morning and eagerly dip into the chips and salsa. Hmmmm....let me define "chips" and "salsa" here. The "chips" were incredibly stale and almost inedible; and the "salsa" was very obviously spaghetti sauce with some hot sauce added in. I struggle to find something good about this appetizer - nope, can't think of anything. We are now starting to fear what will come forth from the kitchen next. I begin to think that a shrimp burrito is too high of a risk to take. Chris begins to realize why the other patrons in the restaurant are drinking so much beer.

Our orders finally come, and I take my first bite with some trepidation. It is . . . unusual to say the least. I have never had a burrito stuffed with shrimp, lettuce, and tomatoes before which was covered in marinara sauce. It is the weirdest tasting thing I have ever eaten. Both Chris and I make it about half-way through our meals before we give up, defeated by the tasteless cuisine. No amount of Pepsi can help in this situation. Meanwhile, our appetites are even more assaulted as we endure the ridiculousness of the Mexican game show currently showing.

So, the next time you visit Seattle and are in the mood for a Mexican/Italian infusion restaurant, try Bruno's! And for emergency reasons, please note that there is a McDonalds' just a few blocks down the street. . .